A little bird at Jezebel.com wrote about an experience she had at the airport the other day, one that involved a particularly delicate TSA search of her most intimate areas and the apparent fear the TSA agent felt about her vagina.

Most of her body parts were referred to using terminology reserved for kindergarten – “chest,” “rear” etc. – but then the agent informed the Jezebel reporter that she was going to feel up her inner pant leg until she felt “resistance.”

“What did you call my vagina??” the reporter asked.

Well as we’ve learned from the last year of over-the-top TSA searches and seizures, this department of airline security leaves much to be desired. Not only are they incapable of acknowledging our boy and girl parts, they also feel it’s a-OK to titillate themselves with what they find within our luggage. (Remember the “Get Your Freak On Girl” note one employee left in a searched bag last year?)

Fortunately for us, there are ways to be sexually aware, comfortable AND satisfied without the government and its safety brigade getting in the way! Collections of stealthy sex toys and sexcessories are making their way around the adult shopping circuit with clever mini vibes; powerful vibrating bullets; sexual enhancement balms, creams and gels; and even cockrings and vibrating couples rings styled like regular household objects!

One glance – maybe even three – at The Screaming O Studio Collection and no TSA agent (or nosy roommate, for that matter) will bat an eyelash, and odds are your luggage won’t get singled out for what security thinks might be a weapon. Because really, sex toys are simply weapons of mass seduction. (See what I did there?)