It’s more a wishbone than a bean.

We’ve all heard of flicking the bean, but did you know the clitoris is actually shaped more like that forked bone we sometimes fight over on Thanksgiving? In 1998, scientists discovered that the majority of the clitoris is actually internal, hidden from sight and is MUCH larger than anything previously imagined. The little nub we sometimes call the “man in the boat” – it’s actually called the glans – is merely the apex of the clitoris with the rest of it extending deep inside the pelvic region. That wishbone shape that allows it to connect to some important interior bits and pieces responsible sexual function and response, which all work together to help make sex feel good for her!

It has no purpose other than pleasure.

The clitoris’ single and sole function is to provide its “owner” with pleasure. In fact, it’s the only human organ that exists solely for pleasure – unlike the penis, which has important reproductive functions. (And makes it possible for men to pee.)

They get erect – just like penises.

Believe it or not, the clitoris and penis are quite alike! It has a glans (the “bean”), a foreskin (the clitoral hood), and is made up of erectile tissue that engorges with blood and gets hard when aroused and during sexual stimulation – and it relaxes and chills out after orgasm.

They’re responsible for the majority of women’s orgasms.

Contrary to old-school belief, the majority of women (some say up to 75%!) need some kind of clitoral stimulation to have an orgasm – no amount of thrusting, pumping or banging with a penis will get most women over the edge. And because the clitoris’ wishbone shape extends around the vaginal canal, women who DO orgasm from intercourse alone likely had the interior parts of the clitoris stimulated by the penis’ position inside.

So don’t worry if she doesn’t moan in ecstasy while you two get it on. She’s not broken and he’s not bad at sex – chances her she just needs a little clit action to help her along the way. (And there are some incredible sex toys out there to help make it happen faster and easier!)

They have twice as many nerve endings as penises.

Though seemingly small, the clitoris is a mighty pleasure player featuring about 8,000 responsive nerve endings – compared to the roughly 4,000 that the penis carries around. This is one of the reasons why some women find it almost painful to have their clitorises touched directly with the clitoral hood pulled back. Too many feels!

There’s no ONE WAY to stimulate it.

We’re constantly looking for the best, the correct, the most perfect way to make her cum (understandably so!) but believe it or not, every clitoris – and the woman attached – is like a snowflake. No two are alike physically or sensually, so chances are that the rulebook you read in Maxim or Cosmo isn’t going to apply to every woman on the block.

Instead, ask her what she likes. Maybe she’ll even show you – SUPER HOT FOREPLAY ALERT. Some women like soft strokes while others prefer hard pressure and there’s no way to know without asking the source. Because at the end of the day, only she really knows best – but if she isn’t sure, finding out what feels good together can be an amazingly intimate and sexy collaborative effort that could ultimately bring you closer as a couple. (Or at least closer to orgasm.)